How do you find space and patience for life to unfold when the pace feels relentless and your to-do list operates on a one-off, two-on policy?
This week, I am really feeling the intensity and pressure that many people are under. At least five close friends have confessed to me how overwhelmed they feel, how hard it is to stay on top of things, how relentless the pace of work is at the moment. To be honest, I’ve been feeling the same. In a session with my coach last Tuesday, I only started to settle by building an ever-growing to-do list as we spoke (“another item for the list.”) At least it was out of my head and onto the paper.
When we’re feeling overwhelmed, it can be easy to put our heads down and just power through. We move from being present with what is to existing in a state of fight-or-flight, fuelled by adrenaline, focused narrowly on the task at hand, perhaps even feeling a sense of accomplishment as we cross things off our list (although this week, my list seems to be operating on a “one-off, two-on” policy).
That strategy of hyper-focus only works for so long though. At some point, our mental and physical exhaustion catches up with us. Our focus fragments to the point we can’t think anymore. We start missing things and dropping balls.
At some point, we all just need a break, time to reset. My friend Debbie calls it “spatience” – space + patience. I love that. Space to reset, and patience for letting life unfold on its own timeline. (I tried to combine space + compassion, but it doesn’t work as well. Space-assion?)
The busier we are, the more we actually need this spatience every day, not just on weekend or holidays. But where do we find this time? My favourite “spatience” moments are early mornings – when the birds are waking up, before the daily commute and school run starts. The world feels still, quiet, timeless, and full of potential. I’ve taken to making a cup of tea and staring out the window as I let my mind wander. Sometimes I journal if I need to clear my head. Mostly I just enjoy the moment of pause – even if only for a few minutes – before I begin my day.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, perhaps ask yourself how you might add moments of spatience in your day to reset, before you burn out. And sprinkle in a little compassion for yourself as you do it. We are not machines, and there is so much more to the world, and to being human, than sitting in front of a computer all day.
